A couple of days ago Jenna asked the following really useful question on our discussion group AutismTalk. The ensuing discussion was so useful I thought it would be great to share it with you guys in a blog post as part of our Autism and Parenting series.

She asked “How do parents deal with family members not accepting your child has HF autism? How do you deal with family members not understanding your childs different sensory needs or when the are having a melt down – not just a tantrum and “need a good smack, or she is just tired” any advice would be great”.

Check out the replies and see if you agree!

“Limit interaction with them as much as possible. They will stress you out, upset you and its not worth the hassle. So Sorry. I’ve found the more you attempt to explain, the more in denial or defensive they get. Its not your problem its theirs.” was Victoria’s tough approach!

Linda’s comment was great “They’re denial is not your problem. ‘sorry you don’t understand, we’ll just go home.’ And go. No arguing, or anger..just facts. And then, hug your kid super hard.” Hugs are good!

Chantel and many other support education ” I have 3 children. With disabilitys 2 of them with asd and has been a long road I had a lot of issues people not understanding people telling me to put a leash on my kids before knowing some of my family members thinking my kids are too hard I just got autisim Queensland to send me info cards out and every time someone had a issue with my kids I would give them a card I have no time for people not excepting my kids or blaming me for my kids special needs my kids are my first priority and if people Can’t see just how special your kids are there not worth the time of day”

Or just ignore them was Alysha’s suggestion “I have learned to just let people’s opinions go in 1 ear and out the other. Or some don’t bother at all, my son doesn’t have autism but was diagnosed with fragile X syndrome 3 years ago. And I have told plenty of people that if they don’t feel the need to get know my child that’s fine he has enough live and support from his mom and dad!”

Rachel is upbeat “It takes time!!!! That’s all I can say. It’s been about a year now and they are just now comfortable saying he has it without saying well if he does have it. My son is very high functioning and last yeat was non verbal at the time of diagnosis. He has definitely bloomed over the year! My family even went on a autism speaks walk! Just keep doing what’s best. You don’t have to convince anyone!”

Of course there were many more but these are a few highlights.

It would be great if you could use the comments box below to share your suggestions!