Autism – Self-Awareness !! – A Guest Post from Radhika the Founder of BreatheYou

Autism Awareness in India

Autism Awareness in India

AUTISM AWARENESS!
What And For Whom?
For The Public Around?
But What About The Ones At Home??

To Start With..Shall Like To Introduce My Younger Brother Darshin Who Has Been My Best Friend Since Last 20 Years!!
He Is Nonverbal ..Neither Does He Use Any Kind Of Sign- Language.
But The Person Closest To Me In This Whole World Is Him.
I Can Talk To Him For Hours..I Cry In Front Of Him..
I Tell Him All My Secrets..All My Friends & Family Come Way After Him.
That Great Is Our Bond.
I Can Understand Each And Everything He Feels.
He Is My Adorable Brother With An Abnormal Sister Who Could Have Been Just Nothing Without Him.

Being A Parent And A Best Friend To Him..And Having Met So Many People Of The Spectrum For So Many Years,
What I Found Is That We Parents Ourselves Our Limiting Our Own Child’s Growth !

Why Is Autism / Autistic Traits Always Taken In A Wrong Manner?
Maybe What They Go Through And What They Are Capable Of Is Way Beyond Your Imagination.

You Know What Is Autism But You Are Not Aware About The Reality And The Fun To Be Around Some One With An Autistic Character!!
Did Not Get What I Mean??

We Need To Create Awareness Among People About Autism..Admitted!!
But Why Is Autism Taken As Their Sole Introduction??

It Is Just A Character Of that Being!
It Is Just A Part Of Him!!
When We Try And Introduce Autism ..Why Is Always The Negative Part Focused Upon?

Today, In The Last Days Of The Autism Awareness Month,I Come Forward With The Things I Wish Every Parent Of Someone With Autism Gets Aware Of!!

1] Respect Your Child.
Only If You Respect Your Child ,Will Others Respect Him .
Keep His Position At The Top Of Everything.
We Are So Much Used To Underestimate Our Kids In A Default Manner,
That We Ourselves Don’t Give Them A Chance To Prove Themselves.
If You Won’t Then Who Else Will??
And Please Stop Guiding Him Everytime In Everything.
Just Let Him Be What He Is.
Nobody Likes A Constant Guidance.
Give Him Some Space And Respect His Rights.

2] Let Them Socialize Their Way !
The Biggest Problem Here Is That We Parents Do Not Consider Socializing To Be A Part Of Them.
Who Said So?
Every Part Of Us Is Different.
And The Autism Spectrum Being So Broad,
No One Thing Can Be Related As Common.
If He Does Not Like It, Then Please Don’t.
But Otherwise,
PLEASE.
Take Them Out,
Let Them Be What They Are.
Let Him Meet People In Whichever Way He Is Comfortable.
My Brother Darshin Has The Habit Of Holding The Hand Of The Person He Meets.
It Is Wrong, But If He Is Comfortable And His Only Way Of Relating To Anybody Is This,Then Let It Be.
If the Person Is Good And Understanding,He Shall Understand.
And If Not, Then He Is Not Worth It!
Yes , He Should Not Harm Anybody..
If He Does By Mistake , Politely Tell Him, He Will Understand!
But Please Do Not Limit Your Child’s Development Because Of Such Traits.
If Done With A Right Intention, Nothing Can Be Wrong !




3] Know When To Ignore!
You Shall Meet Various Sorts Of People Where It’s You Who Need To Learn As To When And Whom You Need To Ignore In Life .
You Need To Prioritize The People In Your Life.
You Would Find A Hell Lot Of Abnormal People Around Who Would Take Your Kid As Being Abnormal.
Please Don’t Let Any Of Their Remarks Affect You.
Learn To IGNORE.
Will You Do So, Will Your Child Get The Power To Trust And Believe Himself .

4] Involve Them In Everything !
Ohh Wow! You Have Guests Coming Home Today.
Rather Then Being Perplexed About How He Would Behave,
Tell .. Talk To Him!!
Who Said He Doesn’t Understand.
If Yes, Then Maybe You Need To Increase Your Understanding.
Introduce Him To The Guests..Involve Him In The Talks.
Darshin Is Fond Of Sitting Exactly Besides The Guest.
We Take It Casually, So The Guest Takes It That Way Too.
It Is All Upon You.

You Are The Pillar Of Your Child’s Precious Life.

Remember This..Autism Is Not A Disease And Just A Part Of Him!
Respect And Show Immense Love To Them..Never Limit Them From Anything They Do!!
And Trust Me..They Shall Outshine You In The Way You Would Never Have Thought Possible!!

You can read Radhika’s original post here.

A Peak Into Darshin’s Life

Autism :- Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by impaired social interaction, verbal and non-verbal communication, and restricted and repetitive behavior.

Thank God We Could Not Find Out This Definition Then In Google!!

In 1996 , On The 21st Of February , He Was Born !!
Introducing Our Family First.
It Comprises Of Our 90 year Old Grandfather , Mom(Trupti Shah) , Dad (Bhadresh Shah) Who Is Into Business
And We Three Siblings, Jitali (8 Years Elder) And Radhika ( Me- 5 Years Elder) To Darshin.
And Now Cause We Sisters Are Married , Our Husbands(Kartik And Shyam) Complete The Family.
And Let Me Introduce You To The Youngest Addition – Viara( Our Eldest Sister’s Daughter ) Who Is A Super – Huge Fan Of Him.

Autism Awareness - an Indian Family

Autism Awareness – an Indian Family

So Darshin Was Born And Being The Youngest Kid In The Family , Was The Heart Of All!
He Was A Very Cooperative Kid.
He Shall Do Whatever You Make Him Do Unlike The “Normal” Small Kids.
We Were All Very Happy,
Till When He Was 2 and a half years old.
A Friend Of My Moth
er Asked Her To Show Him To A Doctor As
He Was Not Behaving Normally!!
Maybe Because He Did Not Cry Or Run After Her When My Mother Left The House Or
Anything!!
And Yes, He Was Diagnosed Autistic !

Which In Layman’s Terms Was Taken As Mental Retardation!!
And Then The World Changed !!
Yes,
Then The World Changed And So Did We !!

We Had Never Even Heard Of Something Like This..
So What The Common Phrase Comes Out Is Mental Retardation !!
Which Still Bothers Me.

Darshin Is Non-Verbal
His Daily Routine Is Waking Up In The Morning , Getting Ready With Assistance And Heading
For An Occupational Therapy Session For An Hour In The Morning Followed By A School Of 5
Hours.
After Heading Home From School,
He Has Some Snacks And Spend Some Time With Mom Where She Talks
A Lot To Him.
Then Goes For A Walk In Our Society Followed By Dinner,
Spends Some Family Time And Then Goes Off To Bed.

Autism awarenes and the extended family

Autism awarenes and the extended family

For Us, He Is The Greatest Blessing Given To Just A Few Lucky Ones.
He Has Taught Us The Meaning Of Life.
It Is Now That We Can See The
Differences In Our Lives That He Has Made!!

So Today , Being The Luckiest Sibling ,Am Writing An Article Here Just Because I Want To
Change The Way Autism Is Projected !!

1] The Bond In Our Family Is Because Of Him .

We Are A Gujarati Family Living In India , The Bond That We Share Because Of Him Is In-explainable.

In Total, We Have A Huge Family Of 70 – 80 People,
But There Is Not A Single Person In The Whole Family Who Would Not Be Fond Of Him.
Even His 2 year Old Niece Would Literally Run After Him To Hug Him
You Can See The Care , The Love For Us All In His Eyes.
We Understand Each Other Just Too Much.
Love Does Not Need Words.
He Is The Heart Of Everyone.

2] Darshin’s Fan Club
He Is A Too Smart And Handsome Boy.
The Most Contagious Thing About Him Is His Smile.
Whatever The Thing Is , You Would Always Find Him With A Smile On His Face.
He Has The Habit Of Going For A Walk In Our Society Comprising Of Around 500 bungalows,
Everyone Around On The Walking Track Undoubtedly Greets Him
And Yes, Everyone Knows
Us As His Sibling.
If There Is A Party , And He Would Have Missed That,
Almost Everyone Would Have Complained For His Absence.

3] Acceptance On Darshin’s Part

Autistic Trait – They Do Not Accept Change.
Here Is The Problem.
You Do Not Tell Them What Is Going To Change.
Since A Long Time I’ve Known,
He Has Changed A Minimum Of 5 – 6 Schools And A Whole House And The Whole Community,
But He Has Adapted Everywhere Very Well.
If There Is A Change In His Routine,
He Accepts It If He Is Told That He Has To Do This Thing Today Instead Of That.
Who Said They Do Not Understand.
The Problem Is That We Are Not Understanding.

What If You Are Being Asked To Do A Lot Many Things Without Being Told Anything About It.
Maybe They Shall Beat You In The Chart Of Acceptance.

4] High Tolerance
If Something Hurts,
You Speak, I Tell,
He Doesn’t Utter A Word.
They Have The Highest Tolerance Of All Times.
Try Not To Speak For A Day.
You Will Salute Them.

Have Written This Biography On Him Just Because What I Am Today Is Because What He
Has Given Us In These 20 Years . Just To Keep It Short, Now That I Am Married For A Year Now, Just Can Not Tell How Much I
Miss Not Being Able To Meet Him Daily(Though We Manage To Meet Atleast Twice A Week).
And A Big Heartfelt Thanks To Our Parents To Let Him Nurture His Way And Always Respecting
Us. Trust Me, They Are Known To Be The Most Positive And Joyous Couple In Town.

Hats Off To The Two Of You Mom Dad.
I Have Always Seen Every Other Parent Complaint Something Or The Other About Their Kids,
But I’ve Never Seen My Parents Ever Loose Their Temper Even Upon Us.

So,Cheers To Us And Cheers To Every Other Autistic House,
Because It Is Just Us Who Know What The Others Are Missing!!