Experiencing Anger from the point of view of a person on the autism spectrum

Asperger's Girl- Anger

Asperger’s Girl- Anger

Experiencing Anger from the point of view of a person on the autism spectrum

A great video from Asperger’s Girl. You can check out a few more of her videos here and here.

Autism and Challenging Behaviour Part 3– Biting and Scratching at School – With updated comments

ResourceBase for Autistic Children

ResourceBase for Autistic Children

As regular readers will know our son, who has classic autism, attends a ResourseBase for autistic children based in a mainstream school.  You can read more about the concept and how it works here https://patienttalk.org/?p=1614.  (As I mentioned I’m really impressed with the quality of support he gets from the school.  Indeed he has just returned and is literally asleep from all the stuff he does during the week.  With a ResourceBase it seems not a moment is wasted).

In fact the ResourceBase played a major role in helping to solve at bit of a challenge which came our way a few weeks ago. I became aware of the problem when   I received a call from Tracey, the teacher in charge of the unit.  Tracey explained to me that there had been a problem at the lunchtime play break and our son, John,  had both bitten and scratched another student..  He had been surrounded by a group of children and rather than joining in with their play, as they wanted, he had become overwhelmed by the experience which made him angry. So he lost his temper and attacked another pupil.

Obviously the other student was very upset and, of course, did not appreciate why John had reacted like this when they only wanted to be friendly.

Tracey spoke with John, privately, afterwards to find out the cause and see how she could help. While they decided not to punish him they did decide that he should not attend his mainstream class that afternoon.

Unfortunately there was a similar but milder incident the next day.  So a tactic to prevent this occurring again had to be found.

Tracey asked me to drop into school one afternoon a couple of days later to discuss how we all should deal with the situation.

The solution she had hit upon, I have to say, was a bit of inspired genius.

After each morning and afternoon session John would go to her room.   If he had not bitten, scratched or fought with another child then he would be able to put another bit on Tom.

So who’s Tom?

Tom is a glove puppet (in this case a monster).  Different parts of his body can be added one by one to create a complete puppet by the end of each week.

If all has gone well John will be able to play with Tom at the very end of his school week as a reward for his good behaviour.

Does this kind of reward work?  Well in John’s case it seems to.  In the first week another child bit him.  Instead of lashing out he curled up into a ball and refused to do anything as he did not wish to lose his time with Tom even if he was angry,

Obviously we are still in very early days but, for us, this seems to be a strategy that works.

So what about you?  How have you dealt with biting and scratching by an autistic child?  It would be great if you could share your story in the comments box below.  You might like to consider some of the following questions when putting together your answers:-

1)      How often does your child bite or scratch in school?  Are they violent in other ways?

2)      What triggers these kinds of behaviours?

3)      What techniques have you used to discourage them from violence in school?  How effective were they?

4)      What do you think about using a reward system like Tom the monster puppet?

I really look forward to reading your responses

 

Thanks very much in advance.

 

SamanthaMedrano My sons 3 and he only bites me his mother or family or himself. He gets too overwhelmed while in public he also has sensory issues. We have a chew tube with him at all times it can also go arround his neck. But no issues in school yet.
ThomasRaphaelHyle I’m going to guess 8 years old
ThomasRaphaelHyle I have only ever been violent when provoked. I am always highly suspicious of stories about other autistics being violent. But this story particularly smells; “playing” is often what bullies try to claim, and I remember as a young child being surrounded (repeatedly) by other children in school and they were not playing “with” me, but “at” me, if you will. I was not a playmate; I was the object of play. The teacher told me nothing was wrong and to go back to playing with the other children. Eventually I did snatch one of them from the mocking, dancing, throwing, hitting ring, and beat his head off the floor repeatedly.
ThomasRaphaelHyle being surrounded does not sound friendly to me. That story has a smell about it.
smckee0707 My daughter is 8 she is autisic as well she is known to pinch hit throw chairs whatever she can when she is upset bc like other kids with autism explaining whats upsetting her isnt gonna happen she is in special ed all day besides for like P.E. ex and 20 mins a day in regular class which seems to be a little to much stimulating for her bc thats when she gets upset the reason i posted on this is bc right b4 her 8th birthday is when she was diagnosed with pervasive developmental disorder/autism and the school has done nothing i took up her diagnosis from the doctor to the school when she was enrolled i made sure i put all that information on her paperwork and at school she was put in detention for pinching a kid who she asked 3 times to move the little girl was leaning over her desk while she was trying to work my daughter couldn’t concentrate at all and she got upset. ..now i am a believer she needs to be talked to about her actions bc violence is never the answer but after speaking with the special ed department the lady told me my daughter did NOT HAVE AUTISM so i politely said are u aware u are speaking with her mother bc she does have autism i do have papers from her doctor and from the social security office saying she is disabled she said oh ok well bring in her papers to me tomorrow and we will work on this so.!!! Question am i wrong for being upset ive done everything by making the school aware of her autism but bc she doesnt LOOK like she has autism its been over looked so i am so upset and a littler nervous to have the meeting with the school tomorrow bc its a very big deal.my child has had such a hard time learning she is suppose to be in 3 rd grade and is only doing low kindergarten average work and it breaks my heart bc i did all the early intervention started at 2 and was told from 2 until almost 8 idk whats wrong with your kid and things like this are still being ignored so my plan i think is to get a good nights rest and go in there as positive as possible but this so un called for and i hate this keeps happening to my daughter she has such good potential. .
homeschoolmommy We had problems with our daughter getting over stimulated at school.  She didn’t get aggressive but would start crying and withdraw.  They disciplined her by making her sit out at recess and lunch, as many as 3 times a day for “pouting and being uncooperative”.  After addressing this issue with them and being told they could not have special rules for any student, I pulled our daughter out and home schooled her.  It is working out beautifully.  I am able to control her environment better and help guide her through difficult circumstances.
go botherdaddy PaulineEstherHunt  PLeas do not take offense.  I am a 34 yr old woman, with a 34 yr old husband who has aspergers and an 8 yr old son with autism.  The problem is the rules and regulation of mainstream schooling.  Alot of parents believe it will benefit children.  My husband was in mainstream school because his family denied and his his condition.  I have a friend who’s son is the around the same age as yours which she is going to start home schooling.  My friend’s son has just started middle school.  The assistance for special needs is limited. In a school built around autism the accommodations are endless.  As you described, your son liking to work on his own….the overwhelming stimulation is probably what is getting him going.  Your son has even admitted he functions better with the tasks at hand and behavior without it.  A special school would allow him to be involved in class but remove him for personal time during his studies if need be.  There are classes that only consist of 6 students per grade.  If he needs a “time out” from the stress (which my husband still needs after all these years.  he sits in bathroom and rocks while he cries) they will give it to him as need be.  Everything is arranged more personally to fit your son than main stream schools such as courses, time invested in them extra help etc.  Alot of people dont like the stereo of an “autistic” school.  I didnt either.  I believed it would have made my son “worse”.  I was never more wrong.  He’s happy and thriving.  I said to myself, “He’s happy and it works for him…”  One big problem my friend is having here (Upstate NY) is that because she said her son didnt need the extra help his whole life, not that everything has caught up with him and he’s struggling, the school board is denying her the help she needs because she has had him go this long without it.  It costs the school board 4x as much to supply the full assistance for special needs, and by putting him mainstream for so long it give the board the right to save their money for someone else by arguing and defending that the 8 years he coasted without proves he can get by.  Best of luck.  And Hope and wish nothing but the best for you and your son.
go botherdaddy FInd the underlining message.  What causes the repeat offense.  The action of biting etc is to get a quick and clear message instantly across to someone.  For example.  Like clockwork, my husband will try to lay with our 8 yr old autistic son on the couch.  My husband will put Isaiah (our son) on the inside of the couch and after a moment Isaiah will bite him in the shoulder.  Its Isaiah’s reminder to my husband “Dont confine me!”  Now, knowing this to decrease the negative behavior, everything thing we do, we ask ourselves , “Will this confine and upset ISaiah?”  If the answer is yes, we find a way around it.  My son pinched, dug, bit, kicked since he was 2 yrs old chronically.  Breaking it down, using this approach, on average twice a month.
PaulineEstherHunt Hi I have a 12 year old boy with asd who is currently in mainstream school has just been given his fourth internal exsclusion for violent behaviour towards another pupil. School policy is to exclude however for my son he likes to be on his own and to be in a room all day on his own with the set work is heaven. He has openly told me he likes it as there is no noise or rushing around and noone bothering him.
The school do not except my query as to an alternative punishment for this reason and simply continue to say he will be punished as per the policy set.
In the long run this is not helping he is lashing out more and more and he knows with very little effort he can get one or two days on his own.
We are still searching for support and advice to help and or ease the situation!
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LisaGillen I love this idea, and i am going to try it!  However I foresee my 3 year old student as having fits every time he is allowed to put another bit on, and still not play with it until the end of the week.  My student loves to play with those bead toys that you can move along skinny metal tubes.  I thought maybe I could allow him to move some, and let him know if he doesnt hit all week we can get it down (or some other distraction toy) on Friday and he will get to play with it